


BOB

by justholdinghands



Category: The X-Files RPF
Genre: F/M, I Was Drunk When I Wrote This
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-31
Updated: 2016-01-31
Packaged: 2018-05-17 11:50:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5868217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justholdinghands/pseuds/justholdinghands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gillovny from David's penis POV. (Yeah, sorry.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	BOB

My name is Bob, and I hate David Duchovny.

I know he’s my owner, and I shouldn’t talk about him this way, but seriously, he doesn’t treat me well. In 55 years, I never let him down, I never failed once, I was always there for him when he needed me, ready, standing at attention, firm and proud like a glorious soldier, and now what do I get? Weeks of abstinence. Days of deprivation. Hours spent in the left side of a tight pair of boxers, all this for a thirty second release in the shower every two mornings. Come on Duchovny! We deserve better than that! Especially after the week we spent when she was there.

Oh God, this week was amazing, as always when she’s around. The day he told me she would be there for a week, I was so happy, I tented his jeans all day long. When night fell, and I heard the sound of Skype from his laptop and twitched because I knew he would take care of me. I have to admit that I don’t really enjoy those Skype sessions. It’s so frustrating for me. I mean, does he have to wrap his hands around my head like that? Let me enjoy the show, dude! You’re not alone here, I wanna see her too. But no! This selfish idiot exposes me proudly for ten seconds, and then strokes me with his calloused hand, preventing me from watching her doing whatever she does to herself. This last time, I was so upset and frustrated that I got revenge and splashed his face. It serves him right!

After that, we didn’t see each other for two days, except for the call of the wild, of course. I think he was mad at me, but everything was forgiven the second she puts her hands on me. God, I was so excited to feel other hands than his on me that it was hard (haha!) not to let go, just like that. But I didn’t crack up, not for him, but for her.

I met her twenty four years ago, and for me, it was love at first sight. It took more time for my owner to realize it, but it’s another subject. Anyway, if memory serves me, the first thing I saw was her mouth. After that, David dragged me everywhere on and inside her, even in the darkest place that I’d rather not talk about. At this time, and for a long time after, she was not the only one for us, but she has always been my favorite, and when she came (haha!) to see us this week on January, I worked hard (sorry, haha, again,) to remind her how much I love her.

But once again, she left, and my idiot of owner does nothing to catch her back. I saw his bank account once, and I still don’t understand why we don’t fly every weekend to London. I know he loves her, I heard him tell her so numerous time, and God knows I do too. She is the most incredible woman in the world. The things she does to me, you have no idea! When I die, I want to be buried inside her. I’m not sure if it’s legal, actually. One of my friend is a lawyer, I’ll ask him next time I see him at the gym.

Anyway, I just heard the ring of Skype, so I got a lot on my plate, right now, and he should be nice with me, and let me see her, ‘cause this time, I’d score right in the eyes.


End file.
